豁然开朗
当我还是孩子的时候，非常熟悉一句老话：“不管怎样，女人都不应该拥有大梦想，因为她们生来就是呆在厨房里的。”
在我国，父亲或男性在每一部分生活中的支配地位仍然存在于我们的文化中。“女人应该在厨房里，男人应该去工作” 或者 “女人应该在家里照顾好孩子，而男人应该去挣钱”。因为这种偏见，我在挑战我自己。一个有远大梦想的女孩，离家4000英里，十九岁，独自居住在国外，经济上稳定，打破了人们通常在我国看待女人的陈规旧俗。
我父亲在我13岁的时候去世了。因为我青少年时期缺少父亲的指导，所以我从单身母亲身上了解了生活。她是一个独立的人，对我们很有耐心，尽管有时很容易生气。我妈成了一个单身母亲和一个女人的负担，我从她身上学到很多东西，这也是我离开她，出国留学的一个原因。因此，从13岁起，我就开始挣自己的零用钱，比如做一名英语家教，卖食品，或者在街头摊贩打工。然而，在我国，这种工作常常被视为廉价劳动力，即使你不是为钱而工作。
去年我到了常州，是江苏省一个发达的城市。我在这边学酒店管理专业。来中国之前，虽然我仍然有这样的刻板印象；亚洲文化总是对男人享有特权，但是来到常州时我发现自己错了。
在常州我看到妇女几乎在每一个部门工作。比如，做一个公共交通司机，清洁服务，做建筑，在办公室，教学生，都是和男人在同一个地方工作。我觉得她们和男人一样受到平等对待。在夏天的时候，常州的温度高达40摄氏度，女人们可以自由得穿着各种各样可爱的衣服，是因为这边的天气很热所以要穿短点的衣服。但是在我的国家，我们害怕被公开批评或遭受男性的性虐待。有些夜晚，如果我离开常州回来晚了，晚上10点以后我会很安全地从最近的火车站独自步行回来。怪我回来晚了，但是常州多么安全，让我感觉就像在自己的家乡。今年的妇女节，校园附近的一些水果店给每位女过路人送了一份礼物，因为这是我们的节日！这里的人庆祝妇女节，所以我非常高兴。即使淘宝和一些在线市场也在庆祝妇女节给予折扣的妇女。我自己感到被尊重，因为他们欣赏这样的小事。有一天，在我走路的时候，我经常看到男人们总是把他们的女朋友或妻子的包放在他们的肩膀上，这真是一件非常有爱的事情，每次远远得看到我都会笑。男人们这样做是因为他尊重女孩，而不是因为女孩们无力自己拿包。
我感到被尊重，我感到自由，我得到了作为女性的人的权利。我可以穿任何我想穿的衣服，不管是什么颜色或款式，因为你有穿它的权利。我觉得步行去常州旅游是安全的，只要你想去。我能感受到每一个商店的热情和尊重，因为你也是普通的人。
最后，在常州生活了一年之后，我才意识到我已经变成了一个独立的人，一个勇敢的人，无条件地爱我自己。学习新文化，在常州过新生活。
ENLIGHTENED
When I still kid, I was really familiar with an old saying "women shouldn't dream big because they born to placed in kitchen, no matter what"
In my country, the dominance in paternal side or man's domination in every sections of live still exist as one of our culture. "Woman should be in kitchen, Men should go to work" or "woman should be at home take care of children, while men ought to get money" because of this stereotypes, I'm challenging myself, a girl with big dream, 4000 miles away from home, as a teenager, living abroad alone and financially stable. Break the stereotypes of how people typically see a woman in my country.
My dad was passed away when I still 13, because the lack of father's guiding in my teenage time, I learn to know life by my single mother, she is an independent woman and patient to her children even sometimes gets angry easily. The burden of being a single mother and being a woman makes me learn a lot from her, so does the reason why I decide to went far away from her. From the age of 13, I already learn to bear my own pocket money such as work as an English private tutor, selling foods, or working in street food vendors. Yet as well, in my country this kind of works are often seeing as a cheap labour even you're not work for money.
Last year I arrived in Changzhou, one of most developed city in Jiangsu Province. I’m pursuing my bachelor in Hotel Management. Before came to China, I still have the stereotypes of Asian culture which privileged men. But there's another case when I arrive in Changzhou. I see women working in almost every sector of place, I saw them as a public transportation driver, cleaning services, doing the construction, go to office, teaching students and they work in the same place with men. I feel like they are placed equally like men. In summer where Changzhou's temperature would reach more than 40 degree celcius, every women are freely to use any kind of cute dress that they want to show up, its all because the temperature was too hot and wearing mini dress are acceptable. Meanwhile in my country we are afraid of being publicly judged or having sexual abuse by the men around. Some nights I feel really safe to walk alone from the nearest train station after 10 pm if I was come back late from leaving town. Blame me for coming back late, but how safe Changzhou just reminds me of my home. This year of Woman's Day, some nearby fruit shops around my campus were gave every passerby women a gift cause its our day! It makes me really happy cause they celebrate Woman's day. Even Taobao and some online marketplace are celebrating Woman's day by giving discount for women. I feel respected, cause they appreciate the small thing like this. Another day when I walk, I often seeing the guys always take theirs girlfriend or wives bags and put them in their shoulders, such a really cute thing ever and could make me smile even just saw them far away. The guys do it cause he respect the girls, not because the girls are weak to take her own bags.
I feel respected, I feel a freedom, and I get the right of human being just as a woman. I feel free to wear anything I want no matter what colour or shapes cause its your right to wear it. I feel safe to walking and have a city tour in Changzhou alone cause you are just want to go. I feel respected with the warmest smile from every single shops around cause you're also a human.
And Then, after a year of living in Changzhou, I've just realized I've changed to be a very independent person, a brave one, and unconditionally love myself. Just by learning new culture, and living a new life in Changzhou.
